An unfortunate side-effect of divorce is feeling a great sense of divorce shame. Many people feel like they’ve either failed, or that others will look down on them for getting a divorce. However, the reality is that this shame is unwarranted, especially with how common divorce is these days. In fact, there’s a few ways you can work on overcoming this shame…
Divorce Shame: Overcoming Guilt & Anger
Practice positive thinking
An important part of overcoming divorce shame is changing how you think. Often times, people who feel this shame have very negative thoughts and self-talk. This leaves them in a constantly negative state, and practically “stuck” in this kind of mindset. In order to break this negativity, you’ll want to begin to think positively.
Instead of focusing on the negatives, look at the positives of your situation. You’re now free to be able to explore thingsthat you might’ve not been able to otherwise. You don’t have to feel shame over doing something which will ultimately prove to be a benefit for yourself in the long run.
Take a social media break
Often times, feelings of divorce shame are triggered by something else. Social media has become a pretty common trigger these days. For example, seeing a couple on social media could cause you to feel shame over your divorce. With how common posts like these are on social media, it might be a good idea to take a break from it all.
Remember that, especially on social media, what people show about their lives will have bias. Of course they’re only going to share the good things, which can make you think that they’re doing things right all the time. As you know, the reality is always much more complicated.
Be around positive people
Sometimes, the people you’re around can cause feelings of divorce shame. Maybe you find yourself around a lot of people who are critical about your divorce. They seemingly always second-guess and talk down on your decisions. Being around people like this is unhealthy for your post-divorce mental health. It’s best to cut these people out of your life, and instead surround yourself with supportive friends and family.
