When it comes to sorting through your divorce, it can be quite difficult. There’s a lot to process, a lot of moves to make for your post-divorce life, and then there’s your little ones… Divorce is difficult for your kids, and explaining divorce aspects to your children is never easy. But, it is necessary. So, we’re here to help you help them…

Explaining Divorce Aspects To Your Kids: Making Sense of a Tough Time

The Divorce Isn’t Their Fault

Possibly one of  the most important divorce aspects to stress is that it is not your child’s fault. During this process, your child may begin to blame themselves for the problems in your marriage. Since they can’t fully understand why your marriage is ending, they may think it’s something they’ve done. Or they may see themselves as an additional problem.

You will want to assure your child that your divorce has nothing to do with them. In fact, you will want to explain that they are a bonding factor for you and your ex.

You and Your Spouse Are the Only Ones Responsible

Not only will you want to assure them they are not at fault, you want to explain that you are responsible. Since they feel life they are at fault, they may begin to take responsibility. This tends to place an emotional weight on them. They may begin to feel emotionally responsible for your feelings and pain. You want to assure them that you are still the adult and the one who is responsible for this. Make sure they don’t experience guilt for being at fault.

Offer Security and Consistency

Because they are experiencing so many changes, kids may feel very insecure. They will begin to expect changes in all areas. And they may wonder how the divorce will affect your relationship with them. So explain that nothing between them and their parents will change due to divorce. Offer them the security they need by keeping things as consistent as possible. Allow them to see both you and your spouse on a regular basis, when possible. By doing this, you can hep assure them that you will both be active in their life.

When you go to explain divorce aspects to talk about, make sure that you always reassure your child of your love. Since so many things are changing, they need to know that will never change. In short, there’s never an easy way to deal with these divorce aspects. But it’s best to talk about them with your child and help them understand.