There are plenty of reasons to initiate a divorce with your spouse. Whether there’s infidelity, lying, a loss of love, or abuse— when it comes to writing that reason down, there are hundreds. However, some of those reasons become much more harmful when you don’t leave your spouse. One in particular, is emotional abuse. Maybe you think it’s happening to you, maybe you suspect a friend is suffering. No matter the person, it’s important that you, and the people around you, can see the signs.
Emotional Abuse Signs: What to Watch For
It’s important to say that abuse comes in many forms, and while we can share some telltale signs— we can’t tell you all of them. Every person, and their reactions, will be different. So, aside from these signs we’ll list— watch out for any unexpected change in behavior.
Keeping an eye out for these things:
Public embarrassment
This can look something like calling you out for behavior, decisions, dress, weight, etc. in a public setting as to attract attention of others.
Verbal abuses
These can be anything from name-calling, to placing blame, and shaming your decisions or looks.
Threatening to keep you from leaving
“If you leave, I’ll kill myself,” is one of the most common methods of doing this. They put the burden of saving them onto you as a method of keeping you close.
Blaming you for bad behavior
Placing blame on you when you mention their behavior, or even when you don’t. This typically comes in the form of: “well if you didn’t do x, then I wouldn’t have to x”, or any form of misplacing the blame onto you.
Trying to make you seem crazy
Most people refer to this as ‘gaslighting’, or lighting a fuse that they know will cause an issue. Maybe they bring up that one thing that’s off-limits, or present false information to make you seem irrational. Ultimately, they’re trying to start an argument.
Sex-shaming
Maybe you aren’t feeling it today, maybe you’re tired, maybe you’re not feeling confident… For whatever reason, you don’t want to have sex today, and your significant other is making you feel guilty, threatening to seek out others, or treating you badly because you say no— that’s a sure fire sign of emotional abuse.
Derogatory language
If they’re calling you names, more than once, this is a sure sign of abusive language. Say they say it once, and you tell them not to do that, and they continue to do so as a means of hurting your feelings or making you feel small.
There is no one-size-fits-all forum for abuse
Everyone is different; every victim is different, and so is every abuser. So, watch for those changes in behavior, changes in appearance, mental state… whatever it may be. At the end of the day, you know those people close to you, and can usually see when things are going South. So, speak to them, offer help, look for signs, and do what you can.
